My chat with Carmen “Wonderfender” Moore! #Outlander AKA Wahkatiiosta

Carmen Moore is one of those actresses that you see a dozen times and think she is a dozen different people. She is like a chameleon, morphing for her roles, not only in appearance but her voice, those small mannerisms that most of us don’t even notice we have.  When I first saw her in Outlander’s Providence, giving Roger a hard time, I was drawn to her. I took note of her name and looked her up on IMDB.  My jaw hit my laptop. I have seen Carmen in many productions and not once did I put it together that she was the same person. (And it’s not just because I’m thick…it’s because she’s magical.)

Magical…talented…for those of you reading this who have only experienced Carmen’s work on Outlander – let me share something with you. She has been nominated and has won numerous awards in Canadian television and film. I’m not just blowing smoke. This isn’t small potato stuff – 9 Nominations and 6 Wins so far! You know, to be exact about it.

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It really is. Props. (source)

I would have been walking around the Outlander set saying “Hey everybody! I’ve won 4 Leo’s and I am a Woman OF Distinction, dontcha know?… Imma big damn deal in Canada eh?” but something I learned about Carmen is she is incredibly down to earth –  with a touch of sass. The girl loves herself some emoji’s and even her signature warns you that she might be up to something  – “sent with love and mischief”.  I’m excited to help you get to know her a little better, I think you are going to like her a lot.

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I know you will (source)

It is an interesting coincidence that Carmen Moore landed a role in this Ronald D. Moore production. She has starred in 2 other shows that Ron created. The Battlestar Galactic web series: The Resistance  and Battlestar Galactica Caprica. She also appeared in the Battlestar Galactica TV Movie: Blood and Chrome.    Worth noting, she has never met Ron Moore and nope, not related either. There, that was our fun fact.

Everyone asks that generic “How did you get started in acting” question, there is a reason for that, it usually is an interesting story.  I wanted to know Carmen’s.   I’ve been “performing” for most of my life, although not professionally. 😂  Mom says I used to stand on the living room footstool at two years old and pretend I was on stage. “Carmen-wonderfender!” was how I introduced myself…to no one in particular! I discovered drama in grade 9 and fell in love with it. I did local theatre in Vancouver for a few years before an agent sitting in the audience of one of my shows approached me and offered to represent me. She started sending me out for tv and film auditions, which hadn’t occurred to me because I was so in love with theatre. I started booking right away and was just in the right place at the right time. It was just after Dances with Wolves was released, and I was basically the only “Native” actress in the city at that time that looked like Disney’s Pocahontas (although, I’ve never considered myself a “Native” actor…I’m just an actor).

Carmen says “right place at the right time”. I think it has a helluva lot to do with talent, those nominations and awards do a lot to back me up.

I found it very interesting that you seemed to break out of that typecasting many Native actor/esses speak about being put into.  Was there something that you did or a conscious effort on your part to make that happen?  YES!! Like I said, I was booking mostly Native roles in the beginning, and I really didn’t want to get stuck in that box. It’s easy for casting directors, especially in Vancouver, to become limited in how they see you, so we need to be responsible to open their minds to us. At one point I thought I wasn’t going to get out of the “buckskin” period pieces so I did the dramatic thing and chopped off all my hair. I went with this cute little bob and started booking cop/detective, lawyer, professional roles. It was risky, but it worked. And, I think I had a bit of an advantage as well because I don’t just look “Native”…I can play just about anything, including Caucasian…just a little more tanned than some! 😁

Do you recall what your reaction was when you heard you landed the role and would be headed to Scotland?    Oh my gosh, I think my heart skipped a beat. 😁  I was sitting in a food court having a terrible meal when I got the call from my agent, so I couldn’t really let out the “whoop” that I was feeling. And I think it took a few days for it to sink in…and even then, it wasn’t really REAL until I landed in Glasgow! It was my first time working outside of Canada…I’ve worked on many American shows, but they were all shot within Canada, so this was a special experience. There is something magical about Scotland. It’s indescribable. It’s a very spiritual place. Best experience of my career thus far.

From the moment your character of Wahkatiiosta came on screen you gave her this essence that spoke ‘strong warrior’. Tell me about that. I fell in love with Wahkatiiosta right from the start…when I auditioned, they were looking for a woman in her 50’s that could tell the Otter Tooth story, and someone to lead the Warriors in to accost Jamie and Claire for the stone. When I booked it I thought, “well this is the oldest I’ve ever portrayed!” 😂

Then I got the scripts and she had been rewritten as “30’s”…and that helped a lot, especially once I saw what they were planning to dress me in….I embraced a more youthful energy and she just got more and more tomboy as I contemplated who this woman is…because she’s not in the books. She was created for the series, so I got to create her in my mind! She is two-spirited, she has very masculine tendencies, but she’s still a woman so much of her strength lies in her emotion. She loves deeply, LOVES her people and would do anything for them, but she wears this invisible armour. It’s all over her.

When I heard Carmen’s take on Wahkatiiosta, I watched both Providence and Man of Worth again, I urge you to do the same. Come back and let me know in the comments if it impacted how you saw her.  I ask you to do this because I am curious if your thoughts match mine. I appreciated Carmen’s portrayal the first few times I watched but after hearing her speak of her creation of the character – I ‘saw’ her and there was a depth I had missed.  It makes me wish we could have the artists who connect with their characters tell us what they feel is at the heart of their performances because I believe it brings us closer to them.

Can you tell me more about Wahkatiiosta? Your speaking voice for her was gravelly and set- it gave me chills- what was your influence for that? I had just spent a couple of days in Montreal before flying to Scotland meeting the director (Sonia Bonspille Boileau) and my co-stars for the Indy feature I shot last summer (Rustic Oracle). They are all Mohawk, and oddly enough I played a Mohawk woman in that film as well. I tried to listen to their accents out on Kanesatake and Kahnawake (First Nations reserves in Quebec) and mimic them as best I could, and Sonia explained how it’s similar to French in some aspects…the “ongh” sounds, like when you say no in French  “non”…it’s somewhat nasal and they speak from the back of the throat. That helped tremendously. My friend Kim from Tyendinaga had translated all my English dialogue for my audition into Mohawk for me. After spending weeks studying our Mohawk lines with our translators and cultural advisors, Wahkatiiosta’s voice just sort of came out that way. Sometimes the characters I portray surprise me as they emerge. It’s like they have a life of their own and Carmen is just the vessel.

And what a badass fighter!  The scenes where you were fighting your Mohawk family to get Roger and his family out of the village may have been visually dark but the fighting scenes were awesome. It really looked like it would be fun to do. Can you tell us about those sequences? I was super excited to do my own stunts for that! I did have a stunt double just in case (Cherie Shot Both Sides was on stand by), but we are quite different body types, so if I had felt uncomfortable doing stunts it would have been obvious it wasn’t me!  But, I was game! Our first take running from the “idiothut” as I’m leading the group was interesting. Our director Stephen (Woolfenden) said during rehearsal “make sure you’re looking back to make sure they’re behind you”…so, first take I did. I looked behind me as I was running, hit a tree stump, or root, or something and down I went! I bailed. I think Sam almost tripped over me! 😂🤣  I wish I had that moment actually…maybe they have it in a blooper reel somewhere…

Watch Carmen get some direction for her badassery with this exclusive BTS video.

The last we saw Wahkatiiosta, she was banished from the Mohawk. To me, this could be an open door for her return to the series.  Since she is a character created for the show with no storyline laid out for her that we are aware of. Would you be open to reprising the role at a later date? OF COURSE, I WOULD!!! I would absolutely LOVE to go back…yes, Scotland is amazing, and it’s always great to be working, blah, blah…but, I really miss everyone I worked with. And Wahkatiiosta is such a joy to portray…I’ve already mentioned she’s my favourite character I’ve ever taken on. So, yeah…I would jump at the chance…

Livin’ the dream. You were able to work with many of Outlanders main cast. Break it down in about a sentence for us what your thoughts were on them.call

I understand many of the actors/esses that joined you on set have worked together before or at least have knowledge of one another, what was it like to be all together across the ocean in this new place, doing what you love with people that you know? Yes…I had a number of friends there. Some I’d known for years, and some that I’d met briefly here and there. That was surreal. To be overseas on this incredible set with familiar faces. And, of course, we all became a little family…I still stay in touch on Facebook with a number of the background and stunt performers because we spent 4 weeks together…some of them had been there for much longer. Gregory Odjig  (who played Satehoronies) said at one point as we’re looking around our incredible Mohawk village, “We’re at work right now…in Scotland…that’s awesome!” 🤣

I have spoken to others that have said good things about Outlanders portrayal of the Native culture but I am interested in your take as you have appeared in many productions. How do you feel Outlander stacked up? I was uber impressed when I went for my wardrobe fitting and the costumers explained how long they had been researching the culture. Most everything was made by hand, and they showed me pictures of the stuff they tried to recreate. They went back as far as they could with what’s been documented, but of course, had to take some artistic liberties here and there for things that are too old to have any records of. They tried to be and were as respectful and accurate as they could be. Our translators/cultural advisors were from Akwesasne and were there to answer any questions we had. Of course, it IS television, it IS make-believe…it is a science-fiction show about TIME-TRAVEL! 😁 So, I had to let my guard down a little here and there and make some concessions. For example, I don’t believe a Mohawk woman would EVER abandon her child for a man 😉Also, Native people don’t speak that fast! I was constantly being told to speed up my dialogue (because they only have 42 minutes for each episode! 🤣) and I really struggled with that because Mohawk words (and, any Native language for that matter) take time to get out properly. So, I felt as though I was speaking in warp speed. I actually have a line that I speak to Tom and I feel like they sped up the tape! 🤣

All in all, they did a VERY good job 💖

Until I can create my own memories in Scotland *insert feel bad for Sherry here*, I live through other peoples adventures. What are some of your fondest memories from your time there? Hahaha…the fondest memory was throwing pillows out our hotel window to the boys below so we could have the most epic pillow fight in George Square! Running through the streets of Glasgow at night, pillows in hand, strange looks from everyone, cast versus background/stunts…there must have been about 40 of us. 🤣😂 It was beautiful. I did a live Facebook video of it all. That, and putting the cones on The Duke of Wellington statue.😉

OK, that looked like a crazy amount of fun. Those are some 3rd level pillow fights!  Click on those links so you can see for yourselves.  If you ask me…when Carmen is left to entertain herself, it seems she gathers up the boys and tells them what’s happening and how they are getting there. I need to mention, I really like her! You can also watch a lovely video she took while on an excursion to Loch Lomond with her friend and co-star Sera-Lys McArthur (Johiehon) by clicking HERE!

Carmen has an upcoming project, Rustic Oracle. MMIWG (Murdered and Missing Indigenous Women and Girls) has been a plague in our country that has largely gone ignored because of the systematic racism our First Nation population faces. I asked Carmen to share a little about her involvement in this movie.  Rustic Oracle was filmed last summer in Oka and Kanesatake. It’s finished and is being submitted to film festivals at the moment, with a theatrical release scheduled for later this year. I haven’t seen it yet but spoke to Sonia recently and she’s very excited to share it. 💕

It’s set in the mid-‘90’s, 6 years after the Oka crisis so there’s still a LOT of tension between Mohawk and non-native. Written and directed by Sonia Bonspille Boileau, it’s the story of a single mother (me)  searching for her missing teenage daughter, but told through the eyes of the 8-year-old sister (the amazing Lake Delisle). I jumped at the chance to shed a little more light on this epidemic in Canada and the US, that not enough has been done about. It’s not going to be an easy one to watch, that’s for sure…but, so SO important.

I think saying I am looking forward to seeing it would sound flippant. I certainly am intrigued.  Facing these truths is uncomfortable, especially for us not living in the communities affected. We stand on the outside, looking in. Very often, judging something or someone we know very little about. What do you feel, we as a society can do to improve our relationship with our first nations cousins? We assign ourselves proud when they perform in productions we love, yet we pay little attention to the troubles here on our doorstep. I believe listening to those who know is the first step. What can we do? That is a BIG, BIG question…that I don’t think anyone has an easy answer to. There is so much to be done in regards to reconciliation with the First Peoples of Turtle Island. It doesn’t help that this country’s racism is still so hidden and dismissed as non-existent…and further to that, we have a Prime Minister who used the mask of solidarity with First Nations to get elected but its now spitting in our faces. 

They love the celebrities, but shoot the troubled  Native youths in the head and call it “defending my property”, they claim that the culture is so beautiful, but let our dead sisters murderer go free…they steal our babies because Native children are worth more in the foster care system…they talk about sustainable energy, and let’s get rid of plastic straws because that will make such a difference, but they judge our people for blocking the pipelines trying to go through Native land, because…you know…economy…why is it always NATIVE land the pipelines are crossing? Because they wouldn’t DARE put non-natives at risk like that…

Wow…I just went on a rant…what’s the answer to all of this? Maybe acknowledgment is the first step.

When we read a message like the one Carmen shared with us here and feel shame, sadness, anger or yes, maybe even offence, that should be a sign to us. A sign that says we need to get on the right side of this.  I am grateful that she spoke the hard truth. This isn’t a simple political issue, it is a human one.

That is why I will continue to listen as long as those like Carmen, continue to talk. We need to learn because it is the only way we will grow. Be an ally.

That got pretty deep so – from one extreme to another. I end my interviews with pure silliness. Why? Because I’m a bit of a goober and after heavy stuff, I think levity is a good thing.

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It’s called balance (source)

Carmen, as a Canadian you get the upper hand because you probably know what these Alberta goodies are but here we go anyway.

We, the ABOotlanders, have invited you to dinner and being the guest of honour, you get to choose the main course, tell us which one catches your fancy?

A) Moose Droppings B) Beaver Tails C) Prairie Oysters D) Taber Corn

What the heck???! 🤣😂  I’m going to McDonald’s… I LOVE THIS, the first time anyone has ever demanded an early checkout. This woman is my kinda people.  Definitely not prairie oysters…I’m not a big beaver tail fan…moose droppings I could probably indulge in…I’ve never had Taber corn, and I love corn…so, I’d probably go with that 😉

It was so great getting to know Carmen. She is one of those people you want to sit down, have a great meal with but know your food is going to get cold because you are too busy talking and laughing.

I am very much looking forward to seeing her upcoming projects and am keeping my fingers and toes crossed that we see her again on Outlander. #BringBackWahkatiiosta, that could be a thing right?

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More Carmen? Yes, Please. (source)

Until next time,

Sherry (ABOotlander founder)

 

My take on Outlander’s E02, Do No Harm. The lies we tell ourselves.

There are many conversations that can and surely will be taking place about this powerful episode.  I thought, and probably over thought the direction, I would go in my take away.

What I kept coming back to was the self-talk of the characters in our story.  As in life, we tell ourselves lies in order to live with our actions, the situations we create and the circumstances we find ourselves in.  Sometimes those lies are harmless small ones, intended to take the sting away and sometimes they are brutally large because facing the truth would be admitting how incredibly horrible we truly can be.

When people hear the word LIE, they think ‘bad’. They think ‘evil’. That isn’t quite what I mean here. Yes, a lie is an intended falsehood, however, when we are telling those lies to ourselves to help cope with something ~ that becomes the crux of the situation.

We start with that, Jamie and Claire. He is beating himself up over helping Bonnet escape. Claire turns to him and explains he shouldn’t take the blame for the robbery and Lesley’s death, it’s not his fault, they both trusted the bastard.  Truth is, had they given him up to the authorities, they would have made it safely to River Run, gemstones in hand and their friend alive. This is a way to help them cope with their loss.  Of course, we don’t want them to blame themselves. In fact, if someone we loved were in a similar position, we would tell them the same in order to make them feel better.  I ask myself sometimes – Do I want the truth or a comforting lie? Lots of the time…a comforting lie hits the spot quite nicely, thanks.

Now, those fools at the dinner party! Believing if it wasn’t for them coming to America and making it a ‘civilized’ world it would be nothing but a wasteland. This a perfect example of lies we tell ourselves to justify our uninvited and or all around crappy behaviours. Not bothering to see there could be another way, ignoring the logic around us. Even when it is clearly pointed out.  Ian took a moment to do that and was met with a condescending reply. Those reactions are often the biggest clue that we know we are full of rocks and bananas.

Jocasta shared with Jamie and Claire how she saw some of her slaves as friends.  This is a deeply seeded version of the example I just gave. Though there may be hints of truth in her statement, the reality is, the slaves are not her friends, she will not truly treat them as such because it would harm her place in society.  She spoke of her struggle as a woman, not being able to speak her mind or run her business with men as an equal. If she was to open her mind, just a little further, including others being treated even worse than that, by her…that is where change can start, no? Simply with the acknowledgment.

Then, you know, Jocasta outright lies. In the sense that she would rather ask forgiveness than permission.  She knew damn well that she was going to make Jamie heir of River Run. It was the main purpose for her party, “introducing you to society” was a ruse created to foist this grand plan upon him.  It sure makes it hard to say “HELL NO!” In front of people congratulating you eh?

Now keep in mind, lying to oneself is also a means of self-preservation in difficult circumstances. This is Claire’s running commentary throughout the episode.  There is not one moment that she relaxes. She is in obvious perma-clench mode. For good reason.  She is having a visceral reaction to slavery and not only being surrounded by it, but by it being forced upon her. It certainly is easy, from the relative comfort of our living rooms to tell her to smarten the hell up because ultimately she IS making shit WAY more difficult. However, Claire…part of what makes her Claire is she feels before she thinks. In this case, it’s not only her “do no harm” oath, but it is also her hate of a system that she KNOWS is wrong on every level of wrongness that was ever created, and being a part of that in any way, makes her wrong too. So, she lies to herself.  Tells herself, because of her interference, she can help Rufus. There will be something she can do to make sure he lives. When the real truth is…there is nothing.  Deep down, she knows it…and that only infuriates her further.

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We now have Rufus (played impeccably by Jerome Holder). Imagine, putting one foot in front of another, day after day having been taken from the life he knew and loved, forced into this, of all lives?  You would most certainly have to lie to yourself. He was telling himself, one day…one day I might see those I love again.  There has been nothing to show him this might happen, to give him this hope. Yet, he tells himself so he may have the strength to see another day.  We have the power to convince ourselves because we have no other choice…we need to hold onto something in order to survive.

If we sat and examined the stories we tell ourselves on the daily, we would see the lies, the half-truths for what they are.  Coping mechanisms…both good and bad. Human and inhumane. They often define our character.  If we find ourselves angry when someone points them out to us, that may be an indication we need to take a self-appointed time out and do some critical thinking.  It is most definitely not a painless process. That is how change happens.

It’s tough, but someone’s gotta do it!

Thanks for stopping by and if you like what you read, or even thought it was kinda o.k., please give it a share, leave a comment or send me cuddles (pickles and cheese knows I can use ’em after THAT episode!)  We livetweet with the W Networks airing of Outlander in Canada, every Sunday, using the hashtag #OutlanderCAN. We look forward to all of our Outlander friends joining us!

For a more in-depth conversation about Do No Harm and the way the show handled the aspects of slavery and the continued effects it has on today’s society, I suggest you hop on over to our friends at Blacklanderz. Their twitter feed has a great deal of the discussions we need to be having.

Until next time,

Sher                                                                                                                                                          Founder of the ABOotlanders 

The Effects of DroughtLander

Did I even know what that simple wee phrase “Droughtlander” would grow into the first time I used it in this meme all those years ago? That’s a hard no…droughtlander

I didn’t have a clue that everyone and their dog would be using it to describe the time between seasons of our favourite show Outlander.  I can thank Diana Gabaldon for posting that particular blog on her facebook page and sending it into Outlander history.  That link has since died because our group, previously known as the Heughliots, found our own identity as the ABOotlanders so you can read it HERE at its relocated addy.

The interesting thing about a drought is the impact it has on the environment around it. In the case of #Droughtlander…the impact largely falls on the fandom.

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Us ABOotlanders are a hearty bunch.  During Droughtlander we get by on help from our neighbours. We share our resources.  This includes talking about the days of all the Outlander, reading about the Outlander and how plentiful and fantastic the Outlander days were. Yes…and how we know that one day the Outlander will return.  We find it immensely therapeutic.

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Alas, there are the people who are crawling across the droughtlander fields gasping for breath, ridden with anxiety & depression because the Outlander hasn’t touched their lips for too long.  They can’t see the Outlander in the forecast & will do anything to make the oasis a reality in their every day…except instead of embracing the good they are allowing the drought to blur their vision of the good it started as. Instead of remembering the things they love they are focusing on things like the bad taste the lack of Outlander has left in their mouth.

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Droughts cause migration…migration of people to other things.  This is normal…when the Outlander comes back – so will the people and so will more.  Some people might not come back and that’s o.k.  Making their life with another fascination or love.  That has nothing to do with the drought itself but the way they chose to deal with it, their choice isn’t wrong. It is what is best for them.

You know droughts also cause wildfires? All you have to do is take a peek behind the curtain of this fandom to see that.  The small flames of discontent are there but unless individuals fan those flames they will never catch & become a disaster. When a spark comes your way, put it out.  How do you do that? Don’t respond.  Don’t blow on it, don’t give it the air it needs to grow. Yes, it is that simple.

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Most droughts don’t have that surety of ending, ours does. Droughtlander never lasts forever but the things we say & do during the drought does.  If we seek out the cracks, we will fall through them.  If we seek out the light, we will feel the warmth.

Let’s do our very best to keep our faces to the sun. That means our heads are tipped back enjoying a bevy.  As spoken before…the true remedy for #Droughtlander. (this could be the reason my liver is now broken – sad story, eh?)

amen

Sher

ABOotlander Founder & Lover of all things happy!

 

 

I’ve got a crush…Outlander SETS and the man who designs them…

Yep, Jon Gary Steele.  I am super crushing on him.  Why?

First…have you SEEN the sets on Outlander?  They have been perfection since the first episode of season one. Season two has blown my mind.

Second…those dimples!

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See…Those DIMPLES.

Photo Credit: Jon Gary Steele on Twitter

I just want to crawl in them and take a wee nap!

Third…He is brilliant. THE Jon Gary Steele (and I always say all 3 names because, he is classy like that)

Be prepared. I am going to do some gushing about a few sets for season 2. Why? Because the recap market is stacked to the rooftops.  I want to celebrate what Outlander has given us. I want to  give credit where credit is due.

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This is one example of how the sets on Outlander support the actors in their stories. 

Photo credit : http://www.architecturaldigest.com/ 
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I often wonder how people like Jon Gary Steele sleep at night.  If this is the kind of thing they envision during their waking hours…what in the world does their brain do while resting?

The Paris Apartment, had so much detail. So much richness…it was like you were visually sinking into the most beautiful fabric ever found.

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The story is made richer by the little things.

Photo Credit: www.architecturaldigest.com
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LOOK at THAT detail.  It takes me so long to just scan the Paris Apartment, the moldings, the BLUE velvet, the interior of the fireplace…I mean really. It is THE INSIDE of a fireplace…that Jon Gary Steele made it this elegant little niche a visual worth dissecting.

Master Raymond’s apothecary was one of my absolute favourites. I found myself pausing and scanning. Pausing and scanning.  I love how the molding was used in the shop. To my uneducated eye it was framing more treasures…everywhere.

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I could play in this room for HOURS, I believe I have!

Photo Credit: http://www.architecturaldigest.com/  http://media.architecturaldigest.com/photos/5706e210b2d72bc242ccecb6/master/pass/Outlander-second-season-set-design_07.jpg

This apothecary makes me feel like I am in a world…inside of a world.

The Star Chamber.  As a HUGE Book fan. I had a hard time imaging the scale in which this set would need to come to life. You can view many images of the Star Chamber on Jon Gary Steeles website

I can not imagine this scene from the books being as powerful as it was; had Jon Gary Steele and his team did not have their hands in this production. The word perfection might get flung around willy-nilly but this absolutely WAS perfection.

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Each of these characters took the lead of the Star Chamber. It was a living breathing character. The way the light danced through the dome to the flickering torches. Even the floor in which we see the Comte take his last breath…it enveloped him.

Photo credit: http://www.jongarysteele.com/

Jon Gary Steele spoke with Variety about the sets. CLICK HERE to watch that video.

I especially enjoyed the sets in the Outlander finale episode this season. As we made our emotional way through the Rev.Wakefields home, sheds & dusty rooms. These places seemed so stale & untouched, yet filled with ghosts.

Culloden House, yes, we have seen in before, yet this time. I noticed the stark coldness permeating through those walls.

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You know, I could very well feature each set, each design and all of the set decoration.  Jon Gary Steele has an incredible team to work with & I know that he knows how much the fans adore his talent and vision.

Me…I happen to LOVE his brain.  What ever it is that goes on in there, I would love to ride one of those waves one day. Watch him in action.  I devour interviews & videos to see if I can just grab a nugget of what it is that makes him tick but…I believe what he has, is that unique, that special…that mere mortals such as myself, won’t ever be able to grasp just what is going on in there.  I am utterly convinced that Mr.Steele has a Cerebral Cortex external pack as well as what he was blessed with at birth.

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My husband often tells me “Sum up.” SO…in conclusion I need to thank Jon Gary Steele. Tell him that he has surrounded himself with greatness in the team he has.  I have always said that we are the product of those we share our days with…this product is an Emmy deserving, soul lifting group of people.

SherryLynn

@ABOotlanders Founder

Bucketlist — Dining with Diana – CHECK…holy snapping turtles…that’s a CHECK!

How? How does something like THAT happen to normal people?

*Blink* *Blink* We must be dreaming!

*Blink* *Blink*
We must be dreaming!

Ok…first. We perhaps aren’t normal.  However the perfect storm WAS brewing.

An event- When Worlds Collide Diana Gabaldon will attend said event. The ABOotlanders find out about said event and decide there is NO OTHER CHOICE. This is the perfect storm. The positive intent, good will, good people & love we have following us around – we knew this event was going to be one we would cherish no matter what.

stormwwc

I am sure you are curious as to how WE…the lowly AB-Ootlanders could have gotten Diana to dine with us.  I assure you there were no Diana’s hurt in the making of this experience.  No duct tape, or chloroform used, no draw of puppies/hedgehogs or Toger’s at the table (O.K. there was a Toger but we didn’t take that out til later) or trickery of any kind. However, I believe the story starts the night before. I think I will start there. This is called suspense.

Stories need that – or so I learned at this writers conference.

Did you seriously just groan?  Rude…that’s just rude.

You are such a kidder! Big kidder mckidderson!

You are such a kidder! Big kidder mckidderson!

These are random details of what happened at this years When World Collide event in Calgary. From how I remember it.  That mean’s artistic license or something to that effect *snort*.

 The ABOotlanders came out in droves. WHY? Because SHE, would be there. Diana.  With our crowd…she needs no last name.  Diana, not only would be here but she would be ALL over here. 

Our first opportunity to see her…maybe walk by her…or make eye contact with her and get a little Diana nod (Someone should make a Diana bobble head…it needs to be very lil, sweet and not wobbly but a stiff wobbler because she has the perfect way of acknowledging you without seeming dismissive like some, hers said “I know you are here & happy to see me” and THAT’S COOL.) was at the Fish Creek Library.  Event starting at 7:00 pm.  Kim & I decided we MUST get there early. 5:00 pm will be early enough right?  Maybe 4:30…there are SOOOO many people who love Diana…its going to be crazy.  Ok…we will go at 5:00. Fine!

Are we early? Huh? Huh? Huh?

Are we early? Huh? Huh? Huh?

We race up the elevator at mach speeds. I lie. SLOWEST. ELEVATOR. EVER. Maybe its super fast but seriously we felt like we were getting sucked into another dimension this thing was so slow. FINALLY the door open and there are a few people standing there. 2 ladies & a gentleman. Staring at us very questionably. “Oh…hello” the gentleman at Fish Creek Library says “Who are you with?” I realize because we are SO early, he thinks we are with one of the authors to help set up books to be sold. Ummmmmm a little embarrassing but Kim…her enthusiastic and wonderful self pipes up “THE ABOOTLANDERS!”  The 3 people stare at her blankly. “The…Ab-whowhat?” – “You’re a bookseller?” he says look down at Kim’s shirt, which is silkscreened with the words  ‘A. MALCOLM  BookSeller & Printer’ (Which btw – Diana told Kim she liked – cuz…well…it’s an awesome shirt)

“Oh no” Kim replies “I don’t sell books, I’m a fan!”  Realization dawns on their faces and they look at each others faces.  These are fans. Oh boy!peasant1

Yep! That’s us! Keeners!  Are arms are full!  We have gifts for Diana, we have a HUGE flat cardboard box which houses our Giant Jamie & Semi Giant Claire (poor girl came out smaller than we hoped).  They were very gracious and offered to let us store our goodies while we were banished to the downstairs library to wait…one WHOLE HOUR! UGH! Longest. Hour. Ever.  We were labeled as super fans…which I will wear happily as it’s kinda true.

6 pm rolls around and we ixnay the elevator and boogie up the stairs to claim our front row seats! We set up Giant Jamie & Semi-Giant Claire in the back of the library.  I really ought to bring a donation box for those who take photos with them. The ABOotlanders could make a mint! It was so great to make so many Outlander fans happy though. We ended up recruiting so many wonderful friends to our group that evening.  Diana came up on the elevator & I watched he make her way in the room…I am sure she has feet but she almost seems to glide…yeah…ok…shhh. I saw her catch a glimpse of Jamie & Claire and her face was one of “Oh…look isn’t that odd- those two just standing there like that.”  Make me giggle inside.No…I giggled out loud and babbled to everyone around me to as what I had just witnessed.

The Fish Creek Library did a great job of hosting the readings. We were gifted with readings by not only  Diana Gabaldon but Daniel Abraham (M.L.N. Hanover), David B. Coe (D.B. Jackson), CJ Carmichael, Faith Hunter (Gwen Hunter) and the amazingly witty and wonderful Brandon Mull.  Brandon won the hearts of all of the ABOotlanders, as well as Diana.

brandonmull diana

I bought his BEYONDERS series for my 16 yr old man child but I plan on reading it as well.  Seriously, this guy IS personality.  The other authors all have something wonderful to offer, don’t get me wrong.  David was another one of my favourites.  He truly is a wonderful human being with a contagion of spirit & I will be picking up his Thieftaker Chronicles very soon!

The readings were wonderful, Diana went last and she read from book 9. *sigh* I am not in a huge rush for this book to come out, even though I will be first in line when it does. I understand her standing in front of me for 4 days means there is no way she is going to be able to write…so…I take this.

She reads so beautifully, I get transported into her story…she says something about Jamie being naked and boom…you can hear the audible sigh of the room, its almost like the collective intake of breath pulls the walls of the library in around us…I sag in my seat. I don’t really mean to but her imagery is just too good. It’s really her own fault isn’t it? Yeah. That’s what I think too.  As she continues to read…the scene is intense, poignant and ends with a universal “oh” around the room. Leaving us wanting more…but that is the magic of Diana is it not?

There was a Q&A with the authors & then the signing.  Since there were only 200 people at this event, it didn’t take long and the ABOotlanders had a plan.  We planned to hang back.  Wait till the last to try and score a bit more time with her because we brought some very special gifts with us.  One of our admins, Cheryl came up with the brilliant idea to have a set of 5 whiskey glasses hand painted by the talented Nikki Galenza, who is our resident ABOotlander artist.

whisky

You can commision Nikki to do these for you.  They are themed to each of the first 5 books in the series and they are stunning!  We wanted to be able to show Diana & explain where we had them done.  Plus taking time to have our books & other bits of nostalgia signed by her. Sweet Kim also  gave her a box of Canadian chocolates, one in the box was whisky infused to go with our theme.  Diana loved the glasses & the chocolates, as per usual was extremely gracious.  I made sure they were packed up good and solid & mentioned I hoped she had room. She said she would make room.

Hanging out at the Library :)

Hanging out at the Library 🙂

We had such a fabulous time. Meeting so many new members for our group & having extra moments with Diana. We were leaving the library all together when I thought to myself “LIFE MADE” because I made her laugh. Lil ole me…might not seem like such a big deal but I do love to make people giggle and making Diana laugh was a special thing for me. We were all tromping down the stairs (Diana doesn’t tromp – no…she was gliding.heehee) and Kim mentioned she would like to hit the swimming pool at the hotel for a dip. In which I had to remind her I forgot my swimsuit so “Ummmm yeah Kim, I’d have to go naked and girlfrien’ ain’t NO ONE wanna see THAT!” in which Diana looked over her should with a laugh. In that moment my heart skipped a beat and yes…I thought “Life made.” However…Friday hadn’t happened yet…That was premature speculation.

See what she did there?

See what she did there?

I am heading straight for the BIG MOMENT on Friday. Of course we would like to think Diana knows who the ABOotlanders are 🙂 She has shared our Blog in the past, she tweets with us

tweet

I don’t make this up…

We aren’t delusional we know we aren’t the only ones, however, we still love our happy lil bubble!

Friday afternoon, a group of the ABOotlanders decide to head to the pub that is attached to the hotel to get a bite to eat & talk about all the awesomeness we have experienced so far.  We are talking about Diana’s readings…when Sam (our Sam…not THE Sam…well she is our THE Sam..not the HE THE Sam…ugh..

I want me to shut up now

I want me to shut up now

you understand right?) whispers to us “Diana just walked in…she’s alone.”  Huh? What? Now? Here? What? Then Sam looks at me and says “SherryLynn you are the only one with balls big enough to go and talk to her!”  I puff up a bit at the compliment but in my head I am thinking “NO I’m not…I left my balls under the sink at home…and that’s 3 hours away!”  However, I squared my shoulders, got up from the table & filled with 9 other women who are relying on me and follow Diana around the pub. “Hello Diana”  “Oh, Hello

Are you here alone (DUH of course she is here alone you bonehead…there is NO ONE with her..save yourself!) or are you expecting someone to join you (good save idjit!)?  “No no, I’m here alone.”  “I’m here with a few (ok…maybe not a few – more like 9 but who’s counting…hell…I can barely form a thought…math can’t happen) friends and we’d  be honoured if you would join us for a bite & a drink if you have the time.”  “That would be lovely if you wouldn’t mind.”  (Wouldn’t mind…wouldn’t mind….oh my gosh…I am doing everything in my power to keep from grasping your hand and running up those 3 little steps to the table with you and yelling “LOOK WHO I BROUGHT FOR DINNER!“) But I don’t…I take a deep breathe and say “Mind? Diana…I can’t tell you what a thrill it would be!” or something like that…I am sure I gushed but I don’t think I got any on her.

We walk up the tiny steps to the table and the looks on the ladies faces were priceless. They looked like little children seeing Santa on Christmas morning, and Diana graciously smiled to them and THANKED US for letting HER join US. I mean come on…Best Moment.  I think I said something to this effect and she made a comment along the lines of her hoping my life was more exciting than that. *snicker* I quite like that about her too. She is “just Diana”. I admire that. But to me…well you all know.  Serious lady admiration right there!

woman-crush-wednesday-shailene-woodley

The pub was understaffed…oh darn. That gave us lots of time to chat. I certainly didn’t want to sound like I was interviewing her but I had SO many questions to ask. So many things I had always wondered. This was the only opportunity I would ever get. She was sitting right beside me. I could touch her.  I tried not to…I think I did once…just to make sure she was real. She was.

I have always suspected & I truly don’t think anyone would be surprised by this however it is something I always wanted to know from her. If she was an introvert.  That is a 100% yes.  Of course introverts aren’t always what people believe but Diana is one & I respect her greatly for how she carries herself, especially in crowds & with people (like us) vying for her attention.

Second up – I have always watched videos of interviews, read about Diana, & viewed media clips of her (not because I am a creepy freaky stalker…AM NOT!) but because of my draw to her personality.  It started for her writing, but her demeanor, introverted nature, say it like it isness, direct style & analytical mind intrigues me.

Way before Outlander became a TV series, her answers to questions or outlook has simply fascinated me. Where I have heard others complain the same answers come again and again…I admire that.  It means she is nothing else but 100% authentic. Same question? Same answer. Why in heavens SHOULD it change? To entertain the masses? Hell no. If we want a different answer then someone ought to ask another question right?  ANYWAY…when you have listened to her speak for a good long time, you tend to get an idea of how this lady thinks. What her opinions might be on different subjects.  So I find myself…while reading certain parts of her books my mind drifting out of the characters I am reading. Such as when Lawrence Stern & Claire are having such conversations about Faith vs Science. Or Claire is struggling with the idea of tying the tubes of a slave being impregnated by her master…my mind drifts from the voice of the character to the voice of Diana and I feel I am listening to her. Her opinions, her voice and her commentary. I wanted desperately to know if I was crazy or if it was a way she was simply slipping “a random” social commentary into the dialogue.

It turns out I am not crazy at all and Diana is IN her books. Not just in her main characters but in her stories, scattered throughout.  I love her & her books all the more to hear that sweet detail.

Since I read the books to my husband with our BedTimeStories, I used this to bring up the topic of relationships.  Her relationship with Doug is admirable. We spoke about how she usually travels on her own but she made sure to take him when she visited the set – knowing he would in fact have a delightful time before he did.  That’s the thing about many relationships, we know. It was lovely to see her face light up as she spoke of him having fun with the crew of the show.

Ain't LOVE Grand?

Ain’t LOVE Grand?

Diana is writing episode 2-11 & will be traveling to Scotland again when they film it.  It is definitely a different process but one you can tell has challenged her in a good way. It certainly seems she had fun with it. I tried to dig more out of her but she won’t budge & may I say it? I respect the hell out of her for it.

She speaks highly of Sam Heughan…interestingly enough, we spoke of him when we spoke of introverts. I said I had an inkling he shared that same trait with her. She said she thought so too however being an actor he certainly knew how to deal with the public and was a very secure & good natured young man.  As we can plainly see in the way she corresponds with him in the public eye on social media, she likes the guy.  Letting us know he has a generous & kind guy.  It is of course one thing to see this kind of thing in play online…it is quite another to hear it spoken.

You know, having a meal with Diana wasn’t as terrifying as I thought it would be. I do NOT remember what I ate. No idea. I am drawing a total blank.  I do know I didn’t have the calamari. *snort*

Yeah Sam...how could YOU?

Yeah Samantha…how could YOU?*snicker*

Conversation was natural with the all the ladies, talking about places to visit. Characters, the books & most of the time “I can’t believe this is happening.” was floating around in my brain. Eventually it turned to “I am so grateful this is happening.”

The ABOotlanders always come prepared. (In fact we were planning on giving this to Diana the next night but Bobbi Jo is awesome and HAPPENED to have it with her and when opportunity knocks – we answer that damn door)

Ok...we answer no matter WHO is at the door.

Ok…we answer no matter WHO is at the door. We are a trusting bunch.

We like to get those we admire shirts with our mascot on them. Toger.  He’s an adorable beaver. Now…we thought Diana might like a cowl neck, 3/4 cut sleeve, beautiful blue shirt instead of a T-shirt, so AB-Ootlander Bobbi Jo had one made. She had Toger put on Diana’s shirt- on her shoulder…I mean how PERFECT !  Who doesn’t imagine looking over her shoulder while she writes? Maybe Diana will wear this shirt one day while writing & wee Toger will have that gift. I was honoured to present her with the shirt, explaining to her Toger & how he came to be.  Telling her how Graham McTavishes reacted to his shirt at Calgary Expo.  It was entertaining…and she was, once again…gracious & lovely.

Togershirtpre

Eventually, Diana finished her meal & it was time to leave – getting her wallet out I assured her that wasn’t necessary. I wanted to take care of that. I couldn’t fathom having shared a meal with her & having her pay for it. THAT just wouldn’t be right on any level. Plus, I am pretty sure simply for the fact I talked  and watched her the whole time…I owed it to her.

Here take it...take it all...I owe you so much more than lunch!

Here take it…take it all…I owe you so much more than lunch!

We had 2 more days of Diana readings, visits & banquets. I also asked her permission to talk about our “date” here – which I received.

The ABOotlanders who attended pose with Diana at the Western Themed Banquet

The ABOotlanders pose with Diana at the Western Themed Banquet

Our Giant Jamie & Semi Giant Claire - Hmmmm- Petite Claire...Hanging out with their favourite person!

Our Giant Jamie & Semi Giant Claire – Hmmmm- Petite Claire…Hanging out with their favourite person!

Gracious…you would think that would be the one word I would use to describe this woman if I had to.  I have thought about that a lot this week…what word would I use?

I have chosen one. Dynamism.  It means a great energy, force, or power.  That’s what Diana has. A great energy. A force that draws you in.  New word!  Dianamism. There you go.

force

 I can’t hold off sharing this with you any longer! Naughtlander has taken a lot out of us but this was the restorative we needed…granted…whisky or your bevvie of choice will help, as per, it is always the best cure for Droughtlander!

droughtlander

Click to see the 1st of our blogs Diana shared on her FB page

KINDNESS & LOTS OF LOVE coming your way!

                               SherryLynn- ABOotlander in Chief

It’s Fandemonium! #DISTRAUGHTLANDERS

I hope all my Canadian friends had a great Canada Day!

togercanada

This wee blog burst we concentrate on you! The FAN!

Which really is FANtastic when you think about it.  How many FANtasies are being FANned each moment of everyday?

Fans-In-Crowd-Screaming

The truth is Outlander is NOT the first fandom. WHAT?! GASP! NAHW! Really???

whwha

It is one of the more…let’s say…Universal fandoms…where you have HUGE GAPS in not only age, socio economics, race, sex, hell…let’s just put it this way…just like the books Diana wrote, are GENRE-BENDING…so is the demographic for the TV show. Simple & easy as that.

This means there are SO many levels of fandoms…by JamieClaire&BlackJackRandall they are ALL RIGHT and deserve to be there!

It is FANatical. It is OUTLANDISH and it WORKS.  We simply need to remember it is UNIVERSAL.  Which means – applicable EVERYWHERE…like…EVERY – WHERE…from every corner of the world. I am pretty sure that means there is more than enough room for all kinds of fans. No matter your views.

Naturally, the ABOotlanders believe there is always one rule that should be followed – that is #AAPI – Always Assume Positive Intent.  That means in reading what I write here, I come from a positive place. One of fun, love & joy.  Yes, I am a smartass at times and sure I can be cheeky however I ALWAYS come from place of POSITIVE INTENT and I will read most things coming from that same place.

aapi

We also have a philosophy of KINDNESS.  It doesn’t hurt. It feels nice & well, we all could do better with a little extra.

This FANdamonium blogburst is ALL ABOUT putting the FUN in our fandom.  We HAVE lots of it & we don’t all have to LOOOOOOOVE one another…that would just be plain silly, but it certainly would be nice if we could respect one another.  You know just like in real life, there are different people, with different personalities, they won’t all get along and love one another. That’s cool. Our fandom is made up of so many different kinds of personalities, it only makes sense they break off into their own happy little groups.  To find like minded people who will lift them up and energize their purpose.

We like to have fun with other fans & have learned since our days in the first #Droughtlander …we can pretty much put Outlander into ANYTHING.   We believe in this fanmily – in all it’s mentally hilarious glory!

relax

We can put a stamp on each of our  OUTcrops of fans.  They have made themselves very visible. The coolest part is, when new fans find their way to this happy huge family of ours, they can find their niche with their people.

I’m going to start with us.  My kinda fan. The kind that love the books & love the show. That just want everyone to be happy & share the love. We are the “Toutlanders”. There are many of us out there.  A nice place to be.  We generally get a long with all of the groups because of our principle way of thinking is in the #AAPI mindset. 

We have the “Freakoutlanders”. It’s not their fault, it’s just their personality. They get really excited about EVERYTHING! They post the same posts on all the FB pages, they tweet and retweet interviews & new photos of cast members. We LOVE the Freakoutlanders because if we miss something all we have to do is find their feed and BOOM…there it is. Everything. ALL the Outlander things ALL of the time!

lizrunning

Outlander HERE! Outlander THIS! Outlander THAT!

There are the “Shoutlanders”. They are…ummmm….passionate.  Yeah, that’s the word I was looking for. They’re the loud, proud & defenders of the fandom, the show, the books, the cast. When an article has been written, an interview done – anything-  that maybe has a questionable comment, in accurate information or dissed ANYTHING Outlander.  They go – vocal. They often go full on MamaBear.  They rally the troops and get shit done so to speak. They “shout” all over the twitterverse all over facebookdome…wherever they can be heard. They rally. Sometimes, the virtual pitchforks come out – they mean well…I am sure they do. Some get a trifle excited.   There are some smaller shoutlanders who come out for the polls – all of the polls.  They band together and get super vocal & it sure works!  If there is a cast member up to win a poll…we usually take it home because of these dedicated individuals.

The “Missoutlanders” can’t ever catch a break.  They always seem to post or RT things days later thinking they were the first to do it.  They are well intended. They just don’t spend as much time on line as, let’s say, the “Hangoutlanders”, who have their mobile device attached to them because they have it there for work or something else…company.  The hangoutlanders know everything right away and pipe it out to us all as soon as they can. We love them because the freakoutlanders follow them closely. They make a great team!

It's all about TEAMWORK!

It’s all about TEAMWORK!

This fandom also has people watching your back for you.   They are like the neighbourhood watch. The “Lookoutlanders”.  They make sure people aren’t stealing pictures, gifs, artwork, fanart or memes.  Rest assured, you are being watched, if you use someone’s photographs to make a meme or to create fanart – you will be called out or maybe even fan-shamed. Be prepared. Rethink your actions.

Outlander police services...WOOWOO

Outlander police services…WOOWOO

I think the “Spoutlanders” & “Uncouthlanders” might fall into the same category here.  Though we always do try to #AAPI  – we may have to question the motives of some who try and delve into the darker side of the fandom. Which is try and make the personal lives of cast & crew their business.  In turn divulge information from their personal lives…this then creates drama. It also starts gossip amongst the fans themselves about other fans…blah blah blah.  There is no positive that can come from that kind of juvenile behaviour.   So it is spouty in the way that when we talk more about others – we aren’t focusing enough on our own stuff…and it’s uncouth because well, that’s obvious.

Tsk Tsk. Be kind. Gossip & being mean...Not so kind.

Tsk Tsk. Be kind. Gossip & being mean…Not so kind.

I have encountered some “Dropoutlanders” and that’s ok too.  Fans of the TV show at the start or they are book fans and will always be book fans but they just could not bring themselves to get past the changes made to the show.  I don’t personally agree with them but it is not up to me to force them to watch or tell them their opinion is wrong for them. That’s silly.

We do have those who still watch even though they can’t stand the changes being made & they will defend their right to hate it & keep watching, I call them “Slipoutlanders“. They slip in and out of loving and disagreement. The “Getoutlanders” want them to just go away. “Stop watching if you don’t like it” is a favourite saying. However,the “slipoutlanders” maintain they like it, they just don’t like or agree with everything they have done & know where it could have been done better. They often make their opinions known, in various ways.

There could be some really intelligent discussions if all of us folks could check into the #AAPI frame of mind. However, sometimes we are too concerned with being right instead of being.

beaver-secret-handshake-gif-2145879 (1)

Be the Beaver…United

I like the “Hideoutlanders“,  they are there, they are watching, seeing & playing a long.  They interact when they want to, play, poll, RT & share. Waves? Nah…not their thing.  Peaceful. Sweet. Jumping into “toutlander” mode when they see fit. They will “Tryoutlander” fan fun when they like and leave what they don’t.

Last but not least…our “Thoughtlanders”…these are our creative souls.  They range from those who put paint to canvas, charcoal to paper, create fan vids and yes – memes and blogs.  Not everyone agrees with me, that they are fanartish… however I believe that if you put your heart, mind & some love into something with some creativity then…it’s art too. It’s different.  Everyone sees the world through different eyes & we can appreciate different views.

batmannthink

Think Think THOUGHT

The FANdom is a family, yes, some say, FANmily.  All families don’t love every member, but the truth is they should try and get along. Try and be kind and if they can’t do that…they should go to their separate corners & love who they are with.  Do the best with what you have.  The truth of the matter is we want Outlander to LAST.  It’s been around over 20 years – it’s grown organically & beautifully.  It will continue to do so, in its own way…that’s pretty cool.

whoseawesome

 

 

SL…ABOoterific

 

Episode 16 In the Flesh -TRAMS- Tobias Really Ain’t Maiming Sam…really.

Who else is glad that is over? Raise your hand!

Me...me...me too...uh-huh...yup...us!

Me…me…me too…uh-huh…yup…us!

As much as we are not looking forward to #NaughtLander – I was perfectly fine with Episode 16 “To Ransom a Mans Soul” being one hour long, because the one hour felt like WAY longer. It made me feel like a virgin. You know what I mean. It was verra uncomfortable indeed.

“Got my tight pants on!”….Yeah…this is not comfortable for anyone. Really.

As per usual before I get into my blogburst, I like to tap into what I see as a bit o’ silliness that plagues the fandom. I found out recently that the likes of myself – you know the type. We, who enjoy the show for the show & the books for the books. Separately.  We, that do not believe the 2 should be compared nor interwoven specimens…because they are, ummm…not the same things. We are called *drumroll please* Kool-Aid Drinkers. Heehee…Kool-aid. Yeah.  Which makes this even funnier to me is –  those who who use this term may often be offended or dissuade others from using descriptions such as “pearl clutcher”, “poutlander” & any number of other equally insulting terms that will offend someone.  This term is deemed O.K. to use  even though it has a particularly ugly meaning behind it, because it was given its blessing from groups who feel everyone’s opinions matter, except those who think that it’s ok to love something for what it is and those  who express that they don’t believe being negative is a productive way to be & choose to say so. Kool-aid. Wanna sip? Tsk Tsk.

 I don’t particularly “like” Kool-aid but I DO think the Kool-aid man is cool as hell!  I also think if you embrace a term & own it, you take the power away others have given it. Soooooooooooooooo…

koolaid

This is the kinda kool-aid we are serving…come and have a glass! It happens to be sweetened with good intentions.  There is kindness instilled in it.  We only want the fans to see the best in what is happening with the series. It is, in fact separate from the books…this has been said from the VERY beginning. Whether you CHOOSE to hear the facts – well, this only affects our happiness with the process. No one has tried to fool or trick us into believing anything different.  When you lay back and relax…the bumps are way easier to take, you might even be able to enjoy them.

animals-as-humans-frog

We have fallen into the land of #WithoutLander.

#DroughtLander2.0 has started… there is #NaughtLander. As you can see – I can go on all effing day if I wanted to & I likely will come up with many many more before the jig is up in the fall of 2016.  Chances are, you will put up with my crap because, as fans, it is what we do.  We read what we love…AND we read what we hate. It is a CRAZY…oh wait…mentally hilarious phenomenon.  That WILL keep this world alive. Not destroy it like some say.

These blogbursts won’t stop because the series is on hiatus.  Honestly…I will just have to get more creative.

This might be the point you are afraid...

This might be the point – you become… afraid…

and you thought BJR was cuckoo for cocoa puffs. Me…trying to be creative. That might be a whole other bag of nuts folks. Mixed nuts. Big…ole…bag.

You know I am trying to avoid talking about something when I am 500 words in & haven’t started.  This is like having the sex talk with the sons but start talking about how they haven’t cleaned their room in the last week instead. Still ending up focusing on the balled up sock in the corner of the room. Yeah…yeah…yeah…I KNOW. I have to talk about it – but where’s their Dad…Can’t HE?

That’s a good idea actually. Hub’s watched episode 16 with me. Twice. Shockingly. We’ll go at it like that. Since you know I’m a gutterdweller – I shall sit down here but try not to be you know…too gross and or offensive. However, expect a few groans. Just…do.

We get the title credit again. Yeah…gutterslug I am…beads n oil. I know what is happening in this episode – I don’t even wanna know what that other thing is gonna be . Yup…I know I am going to hell – I might as well take the express bus. Move over- I know you are in the back seat, hiding…you wouldn’t be reading this blogburst if you weren’t there.

title

Then…then…drums, flutes, what sounds like recorders. Remember recorders guys? Elementary school…we all had to have recorders? Play 3 blind mice? We were so cool.

*eyeroll* Just like him. Really. 3 blind mice with the squeal at the end killed his Pirates of the Caribbean out of the water. Whatever.

Uh-huh...sure...show off.

Uh-huh…sure…show off.

Those english dudes at the prison, they were pretty in tune but the men at arms, my ex-Army hubby really wanted them to be more practiced. Sloppy, out of line…tsk tsk…just foolin’

I kinda wished we had more time to critique the english soldiers because yeah…we went right on into the deep dark dank dungeon cell of hell and torment which housed our hero Jamie. We immediately get a glimpse at his bloodied body & lifeless eyes. It causes some serious cognitive dissonance when you have that cheery drumming and recorder playing happening in the background & you have Jamie’s face – telling you this story. Then we pan…ugh…

Here's JACKIE!

Here’s JACKIE!

Never a reassuring thing.

Captain CreepMaster General is so supine it’s almost distracts you from the fact that he is completely naked AGAIN. Tobias has zero issues with his Aunt Gail seeing him in the all together. You know, I think he might think to himself “Hope Aunty Gail tunes in! That’d teach her for buying me that hideous sweater back in ’85”

Back to the soldiers & cheery loud tunes – I feel like I am being torn back n forth. Put me outta my misery!

just too much & we just started. This aint right.

just too much & we just started. This aint right.

Wait…was that me or Jamie asking. It was both of us.  CCMG owes him a debt & for a moment, it looks like he is going to pay up but SQUIRREL! Ole Captain hears a noise and curiosity done squishes the cat.

Much to Jamie’s horror. He leaves him in the cell to go check out what’s shaking in the halls. There is some crazy noises happening & he is far too nosey for his own good.

knock knockAnother one of those teachable moments right there. You hear noises you can’t explain. Might be best NOT to look. Dumbass. However, I liked seeing your face get stepped on, I didn’t literally see it, though I imagined it because I despise CCMG and that to me, happy thoughts!

Rupert, Angus & Murtagh…Team RAM (TRAM…Do we see a theme…cool huh?!) Scramble through the basement of the prison looking for Jamie & find him as the kine cause havoc in the halls & throughout the courtyard.  The music via Bear McCreary & the kine seriously did a wicked job of kicking the scene up a knotch here. The kine do NOT have a twitter account…I really am not sure what is going on, seems the crazy is slipping…sad.  Anywhoo…Team RAM played this scene with vigor!  I loved the determination to get Jamie out of there and it was clear to us how OUT OF IT Jamie was.

Seriously, Murtagh is like the scottish Apollo in that moment, Jamie wrapped in the plaid slung over his shoulder & him marching out the door like a boss!

so hot

I loved the wagon ride & escape. The chaos of that was happening at the prison with interchanges of Team RAM escaping with Jamie. Claire waiting in the road…ummmm…hunny…unpause it. Hunny…HUNNY! Sheesh. I think my husband really likes it when Claire wears breeches. Both times we watched, I got a view of this –

cait

Yup, gotta admit it. She’s got a cute bum. The joys of watching with the man of the house – equal opportunity in the admiration department.

Between her distress & impatience, the look on her face…no words are needed.  This woman sucks us straight into her anxiety. I was THISCLOSE to popping an ativan when we spotted Team RAM coming over the crest of the hill.  This was the episode that was like a Led Zeppelin song, a minute seems like a lifetime and you are having Tea for One. I’d look at the clock thinking it has to be almost over…and ummmm…no…52 more minutes left.

what year is it

We get a taste of the mashed potatoes that Jamie’s brains have been whipped into when he see’s Claire AS Black Jack…right there in his face. He wraps his good hand around her sweet delicate neck and squeezes  until Rupert & Murtagh get him off of her. He tells Claire “Dinna touch me”  – One more huge clue – this is not the Jamie we know. His mind has been sliced and diced like it’s been in a chop-o-matic.

He starts in on the Gaelic saying stuff like “Claire- you just morphed into Jackface! That’s wiggin me out!” (Really he said…Let me go die.) Murtagh was like “Hey Bro! Cut that shit out! She has a pretty neck…even if you don’t like it…we do!”  Jamie gets all snippy with him too. You gotta admit, he is probably pretty hangry about now and could use a snickers bar like nobodies business & snaps -in Gaelic- at Murtagh to mind his own damn business clag-tail face! (Really, he said something like “Put an end to my torment!” Which sounds way more logical however- clag-tail face- takes the edge off & sends you all on a google search so…) Murtagh’s had enough of this crap and tells him to shut the hell up, he’s not listening to this crap- they have places to go…people to do. (In fact, he said ” I won’t listen to this!”) Yeah…I was right-ish.

mwb

Back on the run they go with a wee but of chuffin’ from Rupert. That wagon ride must have been hellabouncey!

Same ride in today's vehicle...looks like a party

Same ride in today’s vehicle…looks like a party

We hear the bells of a church yard. We see a familiar face, it’s wee Willie. Good to see him again. He introduces us to Father Anselm. This is a character from the books, that has been adapted for the screen in such a lovely manner. As has the Abbey itself. It really doesn’t matter when it is all broken down.

Truth is they had to condense a ridiculous amount of the book into one hour & the adaptation isn’t really meant to please each book reader it is meant to convey a story to an audience – TRUTH-

Really hard to swallow innit?

Really hard to swallow innit?

Adaptations were made that didn’t  change plot lines but changed “things”. Brother to Father…not in the creepy way though. Anselm was a dream – reacting before she finished sentences & taking them in.

Brother Paul, the respect & dignity he showed Claire – the care he gave Jamie…I quite liked the bald headed lil monks they had poking about. The background players were extremely complimentary to the scenes.  Letting Claire know…dude’s body is in baaaaaad shape sister but his mind… a few french fries short of a happy meal & is gonna need some serious help.  Claire seems to know this but had more pressing matters at hand.

See what I did there?

Jamie’s moans & cries brought her back to the fact that maybe she did need to deal with this broken soul thing. She tries to talk to him, soothe him but nope…none of that. Sometimes we ask questions that we REALLY do not want the answers to but need them. This is what happens here…although Claire didn’t get her answer – WE did.  It was Flashbang #1. Everyone were calling them flashbacks…that’s too light of a word for me. These were far too traumatic & gutpunchy. FlashBANG…much more effective.

Yes I know this

Yes I know this “technically” is not a flashbang but I really love this gif…*snort*

Plus…this next part is icky and we have to talk about it.

We have the leisure of seeing good ole dead Marley. All covered in  *shudder* rats *shudder*.  Those narsty vermin are my kryptonite. Sorry..not sorry…I can not STAND effin rats…rodents..little tails swishing

barf

Too much narsty in one small vile thing….just….ewwww.

Digression. Yeah. Sorry. Jamie is still sitting, nailed to the table where Captain Creepy last left him – he is nearly passed out from pain it seems but has the presence of mind to make sure Claire has left the prison.  This just proves how twisted Captain Creepy is. He is so pleasant with Jamie. ” I give you my word, here, have a drink…let me make you more comfortable while I yank that bloody nail from your hand – it’s going to be a trifle uncomfy. Be over quick…just a pinch. Oh dear…you’ve puked all over the floor…that’s all right, I will cradle you gently in my arms like a young child and kiss you tenderly like a sweetheart I once had.. Know why? ‘Cause I am a nice guy. You can see that right? Nice guy…dingy nasty cell…hole in your hand…forcing my tongue in your mouth. Come on- play along! It’s all better now, we are going to have a lovely time, you only have to be receptive. Here laddie”

It’s moments like these you wish this mofo had the internet. Here…go to http://www.immasickbastardDOTcom and get rid of some of your twistyMctwisterson bullshit and leave poor Jamie outta it man!

Ah if we could only redirect the the  insanity!

Ah if we could only redirect the the insanity!

Ole CreepMaster goes in for a let’s say frenchier kiss & complains at the lack of enthusiasm that his partner is displaying – decides that some threats against Claire are in order.  Jamie makes it clear that he said he wouldn’t “resist”.He is NOT going to “participate”.  Probably not the best plan of action.  CreepMaster now had a point to prove & it was that Jamie, would participate, whether he liked it or not. At least his body would participate.

He lifted him up to a sitting position and showed Jamie…and all of us that – our bodies can have minds of their own. Physical response has little to do with emotional response when it comes to reflex.  I noticed in some of social media out there, a few women had a difficult time grasping this concept. Saying it made men seem weak minded, not in control. Ummmm WHAT THE HELL? Our bodies have reflexes…men & women alike – Let me advise. Men have external organs that are easier to get to. This also goes straight to victim shaming & I won’t play THAT game with anyone.

No  really....go...see ya...buh bye now.

No really….go…see ya…buh bye now.

Bodies can, will & often physically respond to sexual stimulation. CCMG took this as a sign that he was controlling Jamie’s body. Adding some words of graciousness you know “Only want you to like it.”  You could see how much Jamie was trying to fight his bodies response & was getting angry with himself for not being able too. Throwing it back at Creepy, tells him just get it over with already…he hawked a big ole loogie in Creepy’s face. Ya know – maybe not the greatest idea at the time because it really pissed him off.

Captain Creepy is still calm for a microsecond asking “You think I can not control the darkness I inhabit?” like…implying he can…but he completely loses his shit! Guess what you sadistic freakshow – there is NO controlling that darkness.  That darkness just went batshit crazy & Jamie was on the bottom of it. Quite literally.

Creepy proceeds to brutally rape Jamie – telling him to scream – well – that HURT. Physically…it HURT…emotionally it HURT…everything about that moment HURT. “I” screamed at my TV right along with Jamie. DAMN YOU Creepy…you rotten SOB.

I don't look like Stevie boy but I sure as hell sounded like him!

I don’t look like Stevie boy but I sure as hell sounded like him!

That was the portion of our show my hubby hid his face. He really didn’t like it. Nope.

Don't look!

Don’t. Like. This. Part.

FlashBANG over. None too soon either. Geez…Sam…whatever places you had to go…you went.  I have this inkling our Tobias – he has a bit of that steele in his veins. He comes up with some pretty sinister shit with the writers to add in. Fingers in mouths, licking backs, faces. On the Ira/Moore podcast he thought “Hey, let’s use dead Morley as a mattress.” Ummmmm…

That boy...he ain't right.

That boy…he ain’t right.

He goes places. In his head. Which makes his acting…that much more terrifying. I’m really glad Ira was like Ummmm Tobias – Richard really hasn’t done anything to you…rats are one thing dude…THAT…totally another. Let’s not. It doesn’t mean Tobias is freakydeaky…it means he is a thinker, he gets into his characters head & he can go to those places. I think it’s a study of how far can he go…they tell him when “Yeah…far enough.”

Sam, I am guessing, this…is an educated guess, seems an introvert. This exposure, quite literally, must have been exhausting for him. I have heard many words to describe his performance in this episode. Many I wholeheartedly agree with. The ones “I” choose – brave, raw & fascinating.  I know NOW what Diana was talking about when she said she looked forward to this.  As difficult as it is to watch someone you care about go through this…and I CARED…it was enthralling. Encompassing. Why?  Because HE made me CARE. Tobias made me CARE. Cait made me LOVE them together. They did that as ACTORS.

It's like way cooler than all this stuff thrown together in one GIF!
That is like, way cooler than all this stuff thrown together in one GIF!

We so often get all whipped up in the who did it better than – we forget they DO it together. We so often get so wrapped up in our favourites that we dismiss the beauty of how well they work as an ensemble & obviously love one another. (Now keep your heads on. Love means many different things to many different people) They wouldn’t be able to portray this so well without respecting one another.

Ooops I did it again. Sorry. Not Sorry.

Ooops I did it again. Sorry. Not Sorry.

There were words spoken prior to Claire setting Jamie’s hand. That’s it. They were spoken. Jamie was telling Claire – he didn’t care. He was trying to let her know in his way that he was lost from her & she…stubborn as he…wasn’t hearing him. She was focused on healing him. She knew…yes…he was broken. One of these things she KNEW how to fix. She had to deal with first.  I truly adore the way these two play off one another. They are a brilliant balance. They don’t even need the words sometimes. Frig knows…the makeup/prop department sure as hell killed it as far the whole business with fixing up Jamie’s hand went.

That looked pretty...gross...n...gross.
That looked pretty…gross…n…gross.

Sure …things have to look realistic. They did. Graphic even. Bones jutting out, skin being tugged at and sewn together. Hearing the bones scraping together, seeing the blood squishing. There are people who squirm ‘n gag at sights like that. There are folks who “ooooh & ahhhh”. There are even ones that sit on the edge of their seat & examine the scene for inconsistencies because they are in the medical profession. Whichever you are -I think we can agree, they did a friggen sweet job of it.

giphy

The voice over helped me through this scene.  Concentrating on her words made me not want to toss my cookies.  The way she wrapped it in that crazy contraption was SO cool looking. Rigged up & completely not like something ‘perfect’. So it was.  Primitive & barbaric. Like the wounds that were beneath the bandages.

Claire is sent to bed by Brother Paul- he will take care of him. She needs her rest. She leaves the room. Walking through the halls, she starts making some retching noises then goes ahead & pukes. Hubby pipes up & says. “She’s knocked up isn’t she…she’s been puking EVERYWHERE!”

Considering we read Outlander a few months ago for our #Bedtimestories, it’s not a shocker he thinks he is figuring something new out.

GOOD BOY

GOOD BOY

It’s always nice to be watching the show & have wee bits from the book pop in. For someone who does adore the books, it is like finding a $5.00 bill in the pocket of someone’s jeans when you are doing the wash (or so my hubby tells me). This added sweetness is Father Anselm & Claire’s moment in the chapel. It’s familiar yet still different. It is poignant & meaningful.  Claire essentially confesses all to him. Taking the chance that she may very well be sitting next to another Father Bain ~

However, I think she knew his heart from the start.  His kindness was apparent.   Hubcicle & I looked at one another with big ole dumb grins on our faces when he turned to Claire & said “How marvelous…a miracle perhaps” such a different reaction from what she had expected. We know that Claire never particularly found herself to be a woman of faith but in that moment – there was calm. It seemed her reserve was restored. It was an awesome moment and even though the powers that be said it was moved all around in post production. They put it in the perfect spot. It fit just right.

Sure, Jesus is cool...it's just some of his followers give me the heebies *cough* Bain *cough*
Sure, Jesus is cool…some of his followers give me the heebies *cough* Bain *cough*

The next day, Jamie is still refusing to eat & he is running a fever. Claire lets him know even though his hand looks like hamburger, it’s coming along nicely.  He’s none too receptive however. He doesn’t want to be saved. That’s just not nice.  She’s trying…really really trying.

We cut scene to the boys, Angus thinks its just a good idea to get drunk. Being sober sure as flip isn’t going to cure Jamie. Murtagh is confident that Claire can heal Jamie’s wounds but he knows that Jamie isn’t eating – that bothers him. Willie tells a tale of his uncle who did the same after an accident…starved himself he did. Uplifting story Willie. Thanks for sharing. Someone smack him would you?  Thanks Angus. Nice aim!

right in my eye

I do like Willie. A lot. He can be a dumb kid sometimes & they do to dumb kids what I WANT to do to dumb kids. Good cuff upside the head. You know…in a kind way *ahem*

Annnnnnnnyway…One of my favourite scenes in the show is between Murtagh & Jamie.  I can’t understand a bloody word they are saying because non hablez de gaelic. Uh-huh…I’m a canucklehead through and through. Sorry. If you DO want to know the conversation.Turns out, it is as touching & gut wretching as they portray it. Hit up this website. They even spell Gaidhlig with the lil accenty things all fancy n stuff.everythings-so-fancy-on-firefly-with-jewel-staite

You can see the heartbreak on Murtagh’s face. The despair on Jamie’s as well. For about a second I want them to take the cameras off of their faces because it is too painful. THEN the show WENT to the next scene…GAH go back. Please! I would rather them go back to the heartbreak & despair faces…yeah…please.

It is another flashBANG…and a bad one. Jamie dragging himself across the dungeon of dooms cold floor. He is naked in a way that angers us. He is bloodied in various places that make us want to go all mamabear. He is struggling across the stones, vomiting & looking very much – destroyed.

The bastard…aka…oh…I have so many names for him right now, none of them the least bit flattering and some might even burn your retinas when you read them. I am hating on him THAT much. Tobias PLAYED that character so well it made me angry to see his smug, priggish *sigh* whatever. Smug as usual. Wanting to know if Jamie has reached his limit. Geez…I WONDER?  When you start hallucinating “Claire Jack Randall”…you know shit’s done gone sideways and your cheese done fell of your cracker.

not funny
Those 2 faces really shouldn’t melt together like that. Nightmares – daymares – night terrors – day terrors…that’s what THAT face is made of.

Its apparent Jamie keeps reaching for the one thing that gives him solace. Claire. Creep Master doesn’t want him to have any part of it then lights to the realization that- “Hmmm this Claire thing can really mess with the boy.”  To watch Claire’s image fade from Jamie’s grasp & him curl up in a naked ball & cry like a babe was simply heartbreaking. How’d we all manage not curl up with him?  I wanted to spoon him. But…he was pretty grimy.  I have standards. *kidding* I don’t.

CCMG played the Claire Card…wanted Jamie’s surrender. “Are you mine?” Jamie – confused, broken & out of his head- heard Creepy but saw Claire. “Yes, only you.” Jamie said in his addled state.  The sadistic dick at this point didn’t care HOW he got Jamie’s surrender- he just wanted it. He didn’t care Jamie was out of his head delusional, he wanted him complacent – that was how he got him.

There is no better term for it than mindbuggery. (I don’t believe the term existed before now, I am pretty sure I made it up- well inadvertently Diana made it up – I just named what he did to Jamie.) Captain Creepy took a walk to his bag of tricks hanging in the room & pulled out his seal…heated in the huge lantern to a red hot brand & sauntered…yeah…the twisted frito chip sauntered over to Jamie & pointed to a place on his chest. Casually telling him to show him that he was Jamie’s. Mindbuggery folks.

mindfuckery

Jamie had a moment…a small moment where there was defiance. The brand did not make it to the spot on his chest where Captain Creepy intended it to go. Jamie did brand himself. However the brand was on his ribs. The look on CCMG’s face was something like…well…that wasn’t exactly what I wanted but it’ll do.

Every. Single.Time. Post production did a brilliant job of taking us out of that cell. Jamie was laying weak & wasted  in that sonofablankityblanks arms, with me wishing I could reach through the screen and tear him from his grasp when they put him back in the bed of the Abbey, rubbing his brand.

ouch-kiss-it-better-1

Oh how I wish things were this simple for our Jamie *sigh*

 I just wanna reach through that big ole screen and kiss his booboo better…the brand one, the other…well. No.

The group gathers as Willie rides up after doing some recon. Redcoats are going to get closer & they know they have to get Jamie out of there. They also know he isn’t getting better, if they wait much longer…well…monks don’t make good warriors do they?

giphy (1)

They do the geography. France. That is the safest place for them right now.  Murtagh makes a point of stating he will secure a ship. Always durable. Always reliable. Murtagh.

Willie’s up next. Oh…sorry…that sounded naughty. O.k. maybe it only sounded naughty to us pervyMcperversons.  I expect by now the majority of those reading this particular burst…ah…are.  Annnnywhoo…Willie, concerned for Jamie & wanting to see if he can help checks up on him. He isn’t a stupid kid like some of the men treat him.  He sees the value of the relationship between Jamie & Claire. He tries to get Jamie to see it again. Granted he isn’t fully aware of the torment Jamie has suffered.  Still he asks what he can do.  Jamie, seeing the blade Willie carries, asks for it. So he can end things…once and for all.

I heard of a huge outcry from fans about this particular scene. Saying Jamie would NEVER kill himself. Ummmm hey folks…what do you think he was trying to do in the book when he wasn’t eating & pushing everyone away…same thing…different means. Yup.  Again, Jamie was in a different frame of consciousness – not the Jamie we know & love. Not the Jamie he had grown into. It was “this” experience that helped him become the man that would never do that. Maybe? Perhaps?

Things that make ya go hmmmmmmmm

Things that make ya go hmmmmmmmm

 Of course Willie tells him to get bent, leaves & tattles on him to Claire.  SHE then goes straight to Murtagh…who is her Dear Abby. First Murtagh is happily telling her he has booked passage on a ship but he quickly reads her face & trails off .She tells him of Jamie wanting Willie to kill him & grasps from Murtagh’s look that he knew about Jamie’s state of mind.  Claire knew too…we all know that but she was sailing down the river denial.

Claire sure as hell doesn’t think being tortured & raped is enough reason to want to die…hell…look at all the crap SHE has been through & SHE keeps keeping on.  Okey Dokey says Murtagh but if Jamie falls so far down a hole we can’t get him out…I’m not going to watch him suffer…I will take him out! That would be kinda like pulling the plug in today’s view I’d say.

This is when Claire…faints…dead away. Big fat hairy hint to everyone.

In the next scene she comes to with Brother Paul caressing her neck & Murtagh feebly tapping his hand on his dirk & being very anxious. Here- I vere off –   I LOVE what Duncan Lacroix has done with this character.  He has completely given life to him that I never expected. I adored Murtagh in the books,but because I connect to introverted & awkward folks. It is like Duncan grasped onto that & not only gave Murtagh this…dimension of being…but gave him an added bit of personality that makes you smile, just seeing him. Man…he made me laugh out loud when he said “Scairt the piss right outta me.” He had the decency to look abashed because the monk was in the room with them. Which gave us a breather. We needed it!  Murtagh has become a steady – not just for Claire but for the audience.thank you

Murtagh calls it like it is.  Jamie can’t be pulled from the darkness that is eating him up unless someone goes into that darkness after him.  It’s quite simple really.  You see Claire think about this & this woman -who has faced down evil priests, witch hunters, scorned teenage girls (those are SCARY), sadistic freaks of nature,  english deserters with rape in mind…yeah…she knows she can handle going into the dark reaches of the mind of the man she loves more than life itself. She has this covered.

Claire starts the prep work. First on the list… girlfriend is making some lavender oil. She means business. Take no prisoners, she is getting her man back.

She goes into Jamie’s room & he is already having bad dreams, she puts the oil under his nose. He hears Captain Creepy’s voice & sees his sick smiling face looming over his bed at him. When Claire speaks again, it is her face there…mocking him & this sets Jamie into confusion. He tells her to leave him be- she’s all “Yeah right…tried that…look where it has gotten us. I’m trying something else.” The more she pushes Jamie…the more Captain Creepy’s mindbuggery pushes forward. Jamie can’t help but see HIS face like he was seeing CLAIRE’S in the cell.  Jamie snaps, he throws Claire to the ground but due to the fact she is ready…girlfriend gives his a swift kick and a few good smacks. Jamie is pretty weak – you know…when you don’t eat or take care of yourself, you get on the flimsy side. He manages to get her on the floor telling her he doesn’t want to hurt her. Yeah…think about that will you. You ARE hurting her A LOT! You want to kill yourself AND you won’t tell her why! That buddy…that hurts a whole helluvalot more than throwing a girl around a room. In the struggle she tears at his…ummm…I’m not even sure what to call what he is wearing. It’s not really a nighty or ever a strip of cloth. It effectively covered all his man bits. Manbit loinwear? Anyway. She tore at it…and saw the JR branding.

What? What's that?
What? What’s that?

She think she KNOWS he was branded. Tries to tell him that it’s alright but he tells her nope.Not alright.  HE is the one that branded himself. That means it goes way deeper. It’s time Jamie told her the truth. Claire didn’t WANT to hear the words but knew he NEEDED to say them…to free himself of them.

It’s true you know – if we let things go in that way. It can free us of an inner torture. Give our pain away to someone who doesn’t “feel” it the way we do.

lifelesson

Toger Brings you LIFE LESSONS

He tells her that the sick & twisted pretzel brain didn’t just use force on him…he made love to him. It was an admission you could tell he never wanted to share with her. Frankly – what man WOULD want to?

This is something that hasn’t changed in centuries with male victims of sexual violence & assault.  I worked with victim services for many many years. Male victims are out there. Male victims are much quieter & there is a huge stigma attached to “being” a victim. Survivors of assault & rape rarely come forward. There are so many complex reasons. More than any one person could begin to explain. Shame is only one of the reasons. Victim shaming is abhorrent and I am a shame the shamer kinda gal.

hang-thine-head-in-shame

Jamie takes another trip down flashBANG lane.  This is the one that many people had a problem with.  This is the one some claimed wasn’t in the book.   It’s all about how we “read” & “percieve”.

Jamie is clearly out of it. He wakes momentarily to see his tormentor getting washed up. Thanks pal. Mighty kind of you to be conscious of your physical hygiene since your mind is a dirty as a toilet seat in a 1 star hotel. *eyeroll*

Captain Creepy wakes our Jamie with some of that stank in a bottle.  He starts another round of his mindbuggery. He brings Claire to Jamie’s mind – speaking of her hands as he brings his over Jamie’s body with oil. With the delusion & unimaginable pain he has been in – the escape of the words “Think of your wife.” brought a resounding “YEAH! Think of CLAIRE…get the hell out of that room!” from even my husband.  After all – Jamie thought he was supposed to die shortly – if he FOUGHT this process – he surely would have suffered greater pain – YEP…this was not a scene that was “enjoyable” to watch. It certainly was not “comfortable”. However…it had a purpose.  Captain Creepy USED Jamie’s LOVE for Claire. He USED Jamie’s NEED for Claire and his NEED for comfort to get what he WANTED. The mindbuggery goes into full on buggery & he breaks Jamie completely. He gets our Jamie to surrender completely. The rotten sonofawhoseawhatyawannacallhim got exactly what he wanted.

OMG That makes me SO angry!
OMG That makes me SO angry! 

Jamie…breaks…he realizes exactly what just went down. The release was inevitable. He faces the fact that at the hands of this monster he gave over everything. He cries like a child & Captain Creepy has the nuts to say “I understand, she will never forgive you.”  Ummmmm really? This guy is more twisted than a balloon animal.

That’s finally over & we are back on the floor of the Abbey with Jamie & Claire.  He tells her straight up – he was glad not to feel pain for a bit in that moment. She needed to let him know that whatever he was thinking he had to know that there was nothing to forgive.  He was sure he was “less” to her because of it – because he was broken by him.  That quite pissed her off.  The words she speaks, she speaks with heart & vehemence. Jamie- throws them back at her.

He weakly gets back onto the bed. Tells her, he is disgusted with himself. THAT…that right there makes Claire go into I’M your wife mode.  She forces him to SEE HIMSELF as SHE sees him.  She forces him into the position she has been in.  Take yourself from ME will you? Then fine.  I go too.

You know…often we only need to see ourselves as others see us to get a fresh perspective. Sitting staring through our own self pity…looking down at ourselves, it so much different than when someone physically holds a mirror up and says HERE! THIS IS WHAT I SEE AND IT’S BEAUTIFUL. POWERFUL. REMARKABLE & I LOVE IT BECAUSE…

lifelesson

Moving on quickly to cutting that JR brand out. Big hunka charred flesh scooped  & flung into the fire quick as may be.  Quite a few loogey’s hawked in this episode. The last one sizzled on the fire with the man meat of Jamie’s rib. Yet another scar to add to his collection. Seriously Jamie, you are like a good ole fashion TIMEX

post-8194-0-36118000-1426349325

Takes a lickin alright…

To the shores for our goodbyes with the men. Rupert & Angus are always good for a laugh with their banter. Of course, this is the last time for a while.  Angus had to leave us with something memorable. A handful of fans were not impressed by his behaviour- uncalled for & the like…we might want to remember he’s often used for comic relief & to take our minds off things of a serious nature.  The series isn’t going to last forever folks, let’s not take everything so seriously – especially the likes of Angus aye?

angus
Yes this is the face we are to take seriously…

I must say, I do find Jamie looks quite appealing in his tricorn hat. Wait.I’d find Jamie appealing shaved bald with a polka dotted beanie. Never mind. My observations are futile.

The way Willie stood on the shore…staring out at them as they sailed away gave me pause. Made me believe – we could be seeing young Willie sooner than later.

Maybe we do...yeah...that'd be cool. Willie in France!
Maybe we do…yeah…that’d be cool. Willie in France! I’m just making guesses not starting rumours. It’s only a rumour if you repeat it.

On the ship, Jamie is trying to get his sea legs, which is hard because he isn’t very sea worthy.  Claire too…green around the gills it seems. They chat about how both are Pukey McPukersons – then Claire & Jamie start talking about their future in France. What they will be doing? Where they will go? The rising…if they can stop it.  I keep on looking at Jamie’s hand. Damn that’s dark.  Bruised and nasty. Keep talking though guys, I hear you.  Claire wants to stop Culloden from happening. She all but convinces Jamie they can change the future if they try.

Shhhhh....we aren't going to talk about THAT!

Shhhhh….we aren’t going to talk about THAT!

But now…she has something else to tell him. SOMETHING ELSE? You wanna change the future. That’s a lot right there sister. Now what?   You wanna fly to the moon? You wanna set Murtagh up with the chambermaid?

Claire tells Jamie she has a little bundle of Fraser baking in her bunnery! OH GOODY! Yeah, all of us book readers knew…know…but they have been playing with the adaption so we can never be 100% sure what they are going to do with things.  This was a great way to play it. Jamie’s face was blank…WTF?! How’d that happen-ness! Sure, he “knows” HOW it happens but as far as he was aware, Claire wasn’t able to have babies.  She isn’t wrong often but this time. YUP! Wrong! Jamie hit the baby making button.

Can't wait till he learns about these lil fellas!
Can’t wait till he learns about these lil fellas!We will get there! I know we will! YOU GOTTA HAVE FAITH!

It’s hard to judge by his face if he is happy because he looks so confused. He uttered a little gaelic…could have been interpreted as “holy shit”. Read the scots blog I posted earlier and they tell you what he said there too.  She simply asks him if he is happy. The gap between his thoughts & his heart collide.  He never thought he would be happy again. But he is. VERRA VERRA HAPPY INDEED! They embrace with such enthusiasm I wanted to jump into it! In fact, they drew Murtagh to them…the smile on his face…well damnit.

won't cry...won't.....WAAAAHH

Won’t cry…Won’t…..WAAAAHH

They leave us with the most gorgeous view of our couple standing on the deck of the ship together. Staring out into their future. Jamie looking down to his wife & growing child. The ship turning…headed to- well- France right?

We have entered the land of #NaughtLander.

Look how beautiful it can be though.  Don't let it get you down.  ENJOY IT.

Look how beautiful it can be though. Don’t let it get you down. ENJOY IT.

GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT!

 Do not despair. There is so much for fans to do.

We promise to be here for you. Whether you like it or not. I will continue to provide my own personal brand of edutainment.  This fandom is FULL of talent.  I am gonna be throwing a bunch of it at you. Check out our twitter @ABOotlanders .  This is where we LIVETWEET with each episode. As we watch on Showcase. We furiously tweet. In fact our magic tweeters started the #OutlanderCAN. Which I will brag @ABOotlanders got to trend during episodes 8 and 16.  Canadians don’t brag but we toot our own tooters when tooting is justified. It takes a team of us @tlmfarmgirl is my TwitterTrending Posse…xo

We love to share the love.  Not, like STD share but you know…the other share.

See...clean... *eyelash flutter*

See…clean share…not dirty… *eyelash flutter*

That wasn’t so bad.  I know it took me a while to get to Episode 16. No…it wasn’t because I was scairt either.  It was because…get ready…I have this thing that gets in the way sometimes. It is called a life. UGH! I know right. RUDE!

Plus I love to hear from you. Comment – blab- chat away. I will answer.

SL/Sher or Hey You…the ABOotiest of ABOotlanders